Thursday, December 9, 2010

When it all changes.

No, tonight is the night I say no, I stop. Tonight, all and any at all even the smallest bit of it, if it exists, of lingering hope falls out of existence. Tonight everything changes because I want it to, because I choose to. Tonight I embrace and I step away, not push, just step away from the path you are walking in, and let you walk right past me.

Tonight is the night I look past the love, past what was, and see what is as it is. Tonight, I cut out the compassion to save myself first, as selfish as it may seem. I cannot be of help to others if I myself am down. Tonight I shut you out.

There is nothing I can do if you can't even acknowledge what you know is deep in your heart, if you can't look past the bitterness, if you can't look past the anger and hurt. Only God can help you, so may the grace of God be upon you and may His presence descend upon you. That's all I can pray for you right now.

As for me, God, keep my head straight please, keep it straight. No more, Lord, keep me strong.

Amen,
Denise

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